Liberace Museum - Originally Published 2010

Hinduism has a concept known as an avatar.  The word is Sanskrit and can be translated to “manifestation” or “appearance”.  Basically, think of it like this.  When God comes to visit the physical plane, he uses an avatar to do so.  It is an embodiment of all that is good.  Krishna was an avatar.  So was Jesus.

Krishna’s presence is supposed to invoke pure joy.  Ever seen a Hare Krishna?  You know why they drop out of polite society and sing all day?  It’s because they’ve felt the presence of Krishna and understand what pure joy is.

I’m glad you’ve all decided to attend my lecture today, because it’s my conjecture that Liberace was an avatar.  You see, on a recent visit to the Liberace museum, I found it impossible not to smile.  Look here and here.  Tell me that you didn’t find yourself the slightest bit amused.

At the very least, this was a man who recognized his role as an entertainer.  It was his job to take in an audience for an hour and a half and make them forget about crappy jobs, rising interest rates, disrespectful children, and the price of gasoline.  He wasn’t proving solutions.  He was giving the opportunity to escape and feel bliss.

Gold and Silver Pawn Shop - Originally Published 2010

Based on the fact that it’s the most popular show on cable television, chances at this point in time you have seen Pawn Stars on the History Channel.  Not only does that place actually exist, but it currently one of the hottest attractions in Vegas.

Here is what I’ve learned about the art of the deal by watching the show: 

1.  Rick will always call one of his friends before buying something.

2. The friend will give the price of the item at auction.

3.  Rick will always ask you what you want for the item in question.   He will never make an offer first.

4.   Rick’s in business to make money.  When you set your price, it’s a safe bet that you will get about half of what the appraiser said it would go for.

5.  Don’t haggle with the old man.  Once he sets his price, he will only come down.

Yes, it is a pawnshop.  But they have a lot more to look at than your standard imitation Stratocasters and circular saws that you may find at the neighborhood store.

Gardens at the Bellagio - Originally Published 2010

A garden. In Las Vegas. Right next to the hotel lobby. I’m serious.

When The Bellagio was constructed, a space was set aside in the tradition of the European gardens. A crew of 140 horticulturalists updates the garden five times a year and deal with the day-to-day maintenance.

Let’s analyze this for a moment. The garden is expansive. It easily occupies the same amount of space as a few football fields. It doesn’t cost a dime to enter.

The Bellagio could have just as easily put another bank of slot machines in the same space. But they didn’t. They took it upon themselves to secure a little bit of real estate just so they could put in something nice to look at. Figuring labor and the cost of plants compounded by the fact that there is nowhere to shove a quarter, it must cost them a fortune to operate it. And yet they do.

Thank you, Bellagio.

Ka - Originally Published 2010

Someone reading this is thinking to himself, “Ka?  Why would I spend good money to watch some French Canadians jump around?”

You should do it because leap they do, as well as a lot of other incredible things like fly and sword fight.  The stage alone is worth the price of admission.

Now, I would love to show you some of the pictures that I took during the show.  But I can’t.  Because I didn’t take any.  They wouldn’t let me.  And even if I could have, they would have come out cruddy because it’s a huge theater with a lot of movement.  I don’t think that the Coolpix could swing it.

What I can show you are pictures of the Ka bar.  You see, this is Vegas, not Broadway.  They drop the pretenses in Vegas and know that there are going to be some real chazzers in the audience.  Yup, you can get a giant drink and then head into the show.

All cynicism aside, this was a great show.  I think my wife spent her money well and I would not hesitate having her spend some more on a future Cirque Du Soleil show.

Hash House A Go Go - Originally Published 2010

Vegas prides itself on going big without any hesitation.  Buffets, big margaritas, remember those Rosewood Grill signs?  It’s easy to get over saturated with the whole “big” thing.  If this ever happens, I recommend heading over to the Hash House A Go Go.  Quite honestly, the size of the food there is jarring.

 On our most recent excursion to Las Vegas found us taking breakfast at the Imperial Palace location.  After seeing the size of the portions, we opted to share an omelet and get a pancake to go.  If you’re not a professional competitive eater, I would recommend going this route.

 Call me jaded, but bigger does not always mean better.  How was it, you ask?  It was pretty good, says I.