Being a peer-edited scientific journal, Animated Meat seeks to shed light on the mysteries of the universe. Today, we ask the question, “What happened to all the adults?”
Adults. Remember them? They were those folks with mustaches and lower back pain that drove AMCs. They used to tell us when it was time for bed and to turn down that god damned racket. I’m not sure when it happened, but it seems that they very quietly disappeared somewhere back in the 1990’s.
Take the Halloween Club, for example. This is a year-round store in Santa Fe Springs devoted to all things spooky. It’s well stocked and the staff was great. They were attentive and helpful.
But a year-round Halloween store? I don’t think that this would have flown back in 1976. Why? Because 1970’s moms were worried about being good moms. They didn’t concern themselves with dressing like a slutty stewardess.
Do you have $1000 sitting around? If you do, they have a storm trooper outfit for you. The adults that used to be around wouldn’t be interested in something like that. That same thousand dollars could be used to put a new roof on the house.
But as I said, this place is incredibly well stocked. There’s even a cannibal butcher shop. Stock up, because the peeled off face is on special this week.
And while I’m busy calling our generation’s ability to be adults into question, I want to point out these costumes. Yep. Leatherface, Jason, and a pimp all in child sizes.